


Maîtriser

by captainkaramerica



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Attempted robbery, Blindfolds, Breaking and Entering, Collars, Conditioning, Dom/sub, Exhibitionism, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Forced Nudity, Gags, I Can't Believe It's Got Plot!, Kidnapping, Leashes, Loss of Innocence, Loss of Virginity, Minor Character Death, Not Safe Sane and Consensual, Not Underage, Obsessive Behavior, Orgasm Delay/Denial, POV Alternating, Possessive Behavior, Size Difference, Spanking, Stockholm Syndrome, light angst though, now with fifty percent more clothing, seriously kylo is really fucking creepy, story gets a lot more happy and consensual, the bulge, very very very loosely based on mâitresse, we earn the graphic depictions of violence tag guys, yandere kylo: the musical
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-09-18 12:25:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9384968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainkaramerica/pseuds/captainkaramerica
Summary: She's always done whatever it takes to survive. Rey Kenobi will survive this, too.He's always taken whatever he wants. Ben Solo will keep this girl, willing or no.When a petty thief gets caught by a millionaire in the process of robbing his house, he takes it upon himself to mete out the appropriate discipline. Too bad that he has no intentions of letting the police have her.





	1. Réunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey, abandoned on the streets at five, has a fourteen-year-long streak of never getting caught stealing. That's finally shattered.

**_Rey_ **

Rey is an orphan and a thief. 

Certainly she doesn't live under the best of circumstances, but at least she's still alive. That's more than she can say for others. Sure, she spends her days on the streets and sleeps in the junkyard, but she has a semi-steady income of food and clothing and running water, if she has time to shower in any of the houses she breaks into. 

She lives on the streets, but some nights she picks a home to target and dedicates at least a week towards sizing it up and getting used to the inhabitants' individual schedules. Rey makes it a point to strike at night, and steals little things, trinkets and tchotchkes and miscellaneous other shelf-stuffers that their wealthy owners would never miss. She understands the feeling of missing things and going without, after all. She usually manages to fetch a decent price and maybe an MRE from Plutt, the owner of the pawn shop she "works" for. It's something she's had to grow very skilled at over the fourteen years she has been living alone.

She's never been caught, and that counts for something in her line of work. 

Sometime in late April, Rey is dragging her haul down to Plutt's shop—a little mahogany picture frame, a porcelain doll covered in dust, and a pen with a gold nib—when she spies a massive estate up on a hill by itself. It entrances her, and she runs towards it, peering through the locked gate and up the driveway. A big old Greek revival stares back.

_This really isn't fair._

The thought appears out of nowhere. It isn't fair that some get to live in manors with manicured lawns and ballrooms while she makes do in an overturned dumpster in the Niima Junkyard. It's not fair. The longer she stares at the house, the more incensed she becomes. What will the owner  _not_ miss? They can just replace everything with something even better once they notice its absence. Or once the owner's servants notice it, more likely. 

It makes for a perfect target. 

She runs off, bitter resentment blooming in the recesses of her heart. For the first time in her nineteen years, Rey is truly discontent. 

* * *

"You can have this," Plutt says, slamming a packet of chickpeas from an MRE rationing kit down against the counter as he looks with beady eyes upon the gold-nibbed pen. Rey's "boss" is a fat, desperately unattractive old man with a greasy combover and meaty hands. Stale sweat hangs upon him like a nasty cologne, and he's far too friendly with his touches for Rey to ever be comfortable around him. She's learned better than to ask for more—she hadn't eaten for two  _weeks_ the last time she had tried that. He peers down at her from his squashed nose, daring her to object to his generosity.

Rey will not give him the pleasure of starving her. "Thanks," she nods, ducking out of the shop. 

Rey opens up the packet of chickpeas and tries not to gag. They're warm and slimy, having been frozen and clearly left out to thaw but at least it's sustenance, and for that she's grateful. Sitting on the curb, a car drives by and someone hollers at her to smile. She doesn't really understand, but waves at the vehicle as it disappears from her line of vision. 

When she's done, she rises and begins to head home, aching and tired. She's following the familiar path to the junkyard when she finds herself heading towards the house on the hill. Rey looks up at it, illuminated from the inside as a fountain burbles out of sight. Rey sniffs. 

She's not jealous, and she's certainly not crying. Rey Kenobi does not shed tears for things she doesn't have. 

A single traitorous tear, fat and warm, rolls down her cheek. 

Rey is already here, though, so she might as well start scouting her next target. 

She scales the gate easily and drops down with as much grace as her half-starved body can manage, which is a surprising amount. Rey keeps out of sight, both grateful for and suspicious of the fact that there are no security cameras or night watchmen patrolling the grounds of such a massive house. God, who even  _lives_ here? 

Rey darts towards the nearest window and looks inside. 

_Oh._

A very tall, broad man is arguing with someone. His hair is long and dark, and from here Rey cannot tell if it's black or merely a deep brown. The man he is arguing with is a red-haired male with an upturned nose and wild eyes. He's so enraged at the dark figure that spit is flying out of his mouth and onto the taller man's shirt, and the man with the long hair looks as though he's about to haul off and punch the shorter, clearly insane individual when an attractive blonde woman joins the fray. She punches them both. 

Rey allows herself a moment to giggle at the sight and continues her self-assigned mission. 

* * *

Rey spends the next week planning and growing accustomed to the schedule of the dark-haired man, who owns the house and lives in such a ludicrous amount of luxury. The red-haired man and the tall, pretty woman are his friends and left together the first night, and based on the matching rings on their fingers they must be husband and wife. They make no reappearance. 

All the better for her then.

Rey finds that the dark man leaves the window in his library (he has a library—Rey can barely read) open every night. He has no servants or pets, which is even more selfish and irritating than if he did. He's so covetous of his own wealth that he refuses to share it by hiring help. But that makes her job easier, as the odds of her being discovered are next to none. She might pocket some silverware this time. A watch, maybe. Things he won't miss. 

He works every night and comes home in the morning, which Rey finds curious but makes no difference to her. She gives no thought to the convenience of it all. 

Finally the night arrives. Rey scales the gate and lands with catlike agility, sprinting across the grounds and pulling herself through the open window. 

The smell in the library is mesmerizing, old paper and dust that tickles her nose. Rey pads over to a shelf and struggles to make out the titles. It's a wonder she can even read, and she's intensely proud of the fact that what little she can piece together is all self-taught.

She pulls a book out, and dust slaps her in the face. She sneezes. 

Rey stills, holding her breath, and pockets the book. The old leather binding reeks of value. And if the silver lettering on the cover is anything to go by, Rey might be able to eat tonight. 

She moves quickly and with the skill of one in their element. She's so engrossed, in fact, that Rey fails to notice the presence hovering at her back until a hand grips her upper arm. Rey jumps violently and jerks away, but the owner of the house holds fast. 

Her heart is skipping like a rabbit's, trapped in the jaws of a wolf. 

"What are you doing in my house, dear?" His voice is deep and husky and  _right by her ear._ Rey shivers, trying to move away. His grip tightens and Rey squeaks with pain. God, that will bruise. 

"I'm sorry," Rey whimpers, shaking. "I can leave, please don't call the police—"

He laughs, but it's dry and bitter and lacking any sort of mirth. "I won't call the police."

Rey exhales, relief all but pouring over her. "Thank you, thank you—"

"But I'm not going to let you go."

Rey freezes and she's so panicked that she stumbles. In her last lucid moments, Rey is struck with the sensation of being lifted up in a pair of very large, powerful arms before her items fall from her hand and the world goes black. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so proud of my mre=portions idea ok


	2. Une Nouvelle Maison

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben is a very, very lonely man. The distinction between obsession and love is not just blurred for him, but nonexistent. 
> 
> Rey does not appreciate her circumstances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for forced nudity and consent issues and basically i shit on the bible while writing this chapter

**_Ben_ **

Ben Solo is very, very pleased. 

He knew it was a good idea to lull the pretty little would-be catburglar he'd spotted hovering in the window during his argument with Hux into a false sense of security. He had tricked her into believing he was leaving for work every night when he was really visiting Gwen and Armitage. And she had snapped up the bait predictably. 

He shifts her in his arms. Her stomach is hollow, but he will have plenty of time to fix that. She was so little and soft, squirming against him. And then she had fainted. 

Ben will have to teach her some manners. 

He edges open the door to his bedroom and lays her gently on his bed, reaching into his pocket for his little switchblade and cutting her clothing off of her body. He wants there to be no misunderstanding—her punishment begins with her total loss of power. 

Oh, he muses, he will be gentle and kind with her. He will feed her and clothe her and, eventually, she will come to love him. For him, it may as well have been love at first sight (from what he understands of such feelings). But she will need time and a firm hand to keep her safe and in check. 

He peels back the mangled fabric obscuring her breasts and cups the pale little mounds in his massive palms. Oh, yes, she is so very tiny compared to him. The girl keens softly and Ben is desperate to see her fully naked now. 

He removes her leggings and begins to cut into her panties. Her body is sacred and he has every intention to worship each sun-kissed inch of her intoxicating form.

Between the apex of her thighs there is a soft thatch of curls. Ben exhales, nostrils flaring, but contents himself with looking and not touching. His little thief is precious to him. 

The thought suddenly occurs to him that she may very well be a virgin. If that's the case, then he must tread carefully. Of course he's going to be her first—the only way it would be with anyone else is if he died—and he must be very gentle. There's no sense in frightening her unnecessarily, and besides, his "tutoring" doesn't involve breaking in her unwilling body. 

She  _will_ be willing, eventually. And she will be grateful for him showing her love and kindness. 

Ben reaches for a bag and removes the object within it—a large collar. When he had first caught a glimpse of her pretty brown head, wide hazel eyes filled with mirth at the exchange between he, Armitage, and Gwen, he had asked them to purchase some supplies. Yes, he had prepared. But was that so wrong? In retrospect, perhaps buying a collar was a tad bit obsessive. But when he fixes it around her neck, she looks very pretty indeed. 

He won't get any sort of perverse pleasure from harming her, but the collar is to keep her in check. Just enough to remind her of who she belongs to.

It's all part of her punishment, after all. 

Ben brushes back a bit of her hair gently, enjoying how despite its clear lack of care it remains soft and somehow not greasy, framing her sweet, innocent face. And he kisses her temples. 

Her eyelids fly open. 

* * *

  _ **Rey**_

Rey shrieks and twists away from the man hovering just above her. His face is absurdly calm, his body language reflecting his contentment and self-satisfaction.

"Where are we?" Best to get straight to the point.

He smiles and leans forward as though to hug her, and Rey is suddenly very aware that her clothes, including her underwear, are missing. Gone. She looks over the side of the bed and finds them ripped to shreds, and with that she fully realizes that she is naked, on a bed, with the dark man looking down at her modest chest shamelessly. 

"You're my guest."

Rey flushes with anger and embarrassment, but she's not quite ready to feel fear just yet. This is not the worst thing she has had to make it through. She will do as she always has done—survive.

Rey is very good at surviving. 

"I'm stuck in your house, aren't I?" Rey cannot think of a worse place to be. She groans. Being thrown in a prison cell and awaiting trial only to be sentenced to a few years would be preferable to this. At least she would be issued clothing. As it stands, a draft blows over, and Rey's cheeks darken when she feels her nipples stand at attention. 

"You're very intelligent." Rey assumes him to be quipping back at her with sarcasm, but his voice and face are very serious. "Yes, you're still in my house." She wants to vomit when his hand comes to cup her cheek, but his touch is also... Gentle. Soothing. 

_Where did that thought come from?_

Still, like most of Rey's unwanted musings, there is truth to the observation: his hand is soft. But she notices the calluses, which baffles her. A man as wealthy as he surely would never have to partake in an honest day of work in his life. 

She's shaken from her reverie when she recalls that she is still very, very naked. It occurs to her that maybe the key to making it out of this is to play along. To pretend. 

Still. Being forcibly undressed and dumped in a bed after being caught filching the owner's possessions is wildly uncomfortable. 

"Do you have any clothing?"

He laughs. Rey's stomach sinks. 

"You'll have to earn the right."

She folds her hands in her lap and looks down. And notices the collar for the first time.

Rey  _shrieks_ , hands flying to the thick band of metal locked around her neck and staring up at the man in complete and utter disbelief. "Why?" Oh, he's  _insane._ There are lines that Rey wouldn't cross even at her lowest, and the owner of the house might as well have performed an acrobatic fucking pirouette over it. 

She starts to cry. 

Rey has never been one to cry. Constantly fending for the sake of her own livelihood has not afforded her that luxury. And it's probably not the best idea to break down like this in front of him, but oh well. 

He leans forward and cups her cheeks, pressing them together gently. "You're so cute."

"What?" Rey is no longer crying. Rey is  _angry._ But her face is distorted as he squishes her cheeks together, so she fumes in silence. 

"Think. You know why. You're very cute when you play dumb." Rey reaches up and throws his hands off of her, scooting farther up the bed and jumping when her back hits the headboard. Stupidly Rey thinks that Plutt would like the bookend sitting on the owner's dresser.

"I don't know what you want!" And truly, she doesn't. Rey hiccups, a sob gathering deep in the recesses of her traitorous lungs. "I don't understand why you can't just call the police."

Yes, at this point Rey would prefer the cold, impersonal floor of a prison cell over some unstable millionaire's bed. 

"I can't do that. If I wanted to get them involved, I would have the second I spotted you hovering in my window." He sits on the edge of the bed, pulling her into his lap and pinning her flush against his chest. He nuzzles the top of her head and Rey utters a choked whimper. "I'm going to help you."

She has no desire to see what his idea of "help" entails. 

They sit like that for what might be a few minutes but feels like hours before he kisses her temple. "Are you hungry?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for all the comments guys!


	3. Tranquillité

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey gets a bath and a lesson.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more warning for consent issues, forced bathing, and general kylo creepiness. im excited for this fic so im gonna keep updating it like there's no tomorrow

_**Ben** _

Her name is Rey. It's a very pretty and fitting name and he could remark on its poetic relevance to his situation, but he's busy drawing a bath for her. 

His Rey. 

The thought of having her with him at all times is at once both sobering and deeply intriguing. The things he will do with her.  _To_ her. 

She had been very reluctant to eat. In fact, his pretty little thief had spit on him when he had dragged her down to the dining room, a massive, formal affair that dwarfed even he and especially her. So he was forced to tie her down. It brought him no pleasure, of course, except for when it did, when her delicate arms strained to free themselves as he fed her little bites of some leftover chicken dish so as not to upset her stomach. 

Rey is still tied to that chair in the dining room, and if he listens closely, he can hear her yelling at him. But the water rapidly filling the tub drowns her out, and it takes every ounce of his self-control not to think about her pretty breasts swaying as she bounces in her seat, trying and failing to extricate herself from her bonds. 

He's going to be able to touch her when he washes her, the pads of his fingertips skimming her slit as he runs a warm washcloth between her thighs. He can already hear her purring his name in his fantasy as he plants a kiss on her shoulder and stays there, sucking a bruise to the surface of her freckled skin. 

"You motherfucker!" She's going to scream herself hoarse. 

_Naughty girl._

The tub is filled with enough water to leave her upper half open to his heavy gaze, and he adds a heavy helping of bubble-bath he's sure she'll find endlessly entertaining. Rey will look absolutely precious, wet hair clinging to her back, covered in bubbles and really, truly clean for what might be the first time in her life. For he knows why she had tried to rob his house, and knows the life she led before he had shown her generosity by taking her into his home. 

Yes. He's going to cherish her. He takes excellent care of the things that belong to him. 

"Come down here, you prick! Come down here and untie me so I can _kick_   _your ass,_ you great big awful brute!" 

She is so very cute. He remembers how adorable she had looked with her cheeks squished together. 

"Why don't you just  _fucking_ kill me?" 

_Naughty, naughty girl. Very naughty._

He smiles and imagines her punishment for such foul language. He would love to take her over his lap and spank her raw, until her cheeks are as red as her plump bottom and she is sobbing his name, promising that she will behave. 

Ben rises, mopping the sweat beading on his brow from the humidity of the bathroom on a towel, and starts down for the dining room. 

As he had expected, she's still tethered to the chair, wide hazel eyes shining with unshed tears. He shushes her and rushes over, and she recoils as he removes her bonds. Her wrists bear the marks of the rope. 

"Did that hurt? Poor thing," he says gently, kissing the marks and carrying her up the stairs before she has time to fight him. 

"What are you doing?" Rey squirms in his arms, and he nudges open the door to the bathroom before locking it and placing her on her feet. Ben looks at her collar hungrily and she looks everywhere else but up at him. 

"Get in," he says simply, gesturing to the tub. To his immense relief she complies and he watches her, waiting for her to order him to leave. 

She doesn't, and he attributes it to her believing that if he's seen her nude for hours on end now, then why should modesty be something she should be concerned about? 

His smart little thief. 

Immediately she grunts and Ben rushes to her side. "Are you hurt?"

"No," she says softly, looking down. Her hair is still tied up in a strange trio of buns, and he sets about loosing them. She does not struggle. "The water—it's warm. I was surprised."

"You think that I would torture you? Douse you with freezing water?"

"That would be preferable to this," she snaps. 

"Rey, you would want me to torture you over treating you gently and—"

"I would prefer torture rather than having your hands all over me, as though I gave you permission to even think about pawing at my body." Ben tugs on her last bun and it falls, the uneven ends of her hair skirting the surface of the water. He chooses to ignore her. 

"Duck your head back." Despite her harsh words she does as he requests, and he kisses her temple. She flinches. Ben squeezes a bit of shampoo into his hand and begins to knead her scalp with it. 

Rey protests, but her words bleed together and eventually he tunes them out altogether. This is bliss. This is happiness—taking care of the ones you love. Rey's pretty hazel eyes are shut and he rinses her hair, kissing her cheek when he's done running the conditioner through it. 

He wets a washcloth and she blinks up at him. Her eyes betray her distress. 

"Let me do it."

Ben kisses her cheek again. It's pink and warm and she must be blushing. It's a very alluring sight, although seducing him is clearly not her intent. "No. I'm going to take care of you."

* * *

**_Rey_ **

He tied her to a chair and force-fed her and now he's talking about  _taking care of her._

"Stop it," Rey whines when he runs the washcloth over her breasts, the rough cloth brushing against and teasing her nipples. If she was blushing before, she must be positively red by now. He's planting little kisses on her jaw and Rey tries to push him away but he's so  _strong_ and dark and—

The thought occurs to her that she doesn't even know his name. She's been calling him "the owner of the house" this entire time. 

He had inquired as to what she called herself and stupidly she had given him the truth: Rey Kenobi. But he had not returned the favor and Rey is suddenly very curious. 

"What's your name?" 

A pause, and then—

"Kylo Ren."

Is he joking? Rey can't tell, but he hasn't been intentionally humorous this entire time. So he must be serious. 

The washcloth traces her lacking curves and squeezes at the swell of her hips before dipping between her thighs. 

"Stop, no, what are you doing?" But it feels... Good. The fabric is rough and scratches an itch she didn't even know she had, and she feels his breath on her ear, purring as he brushes against something that has her legs spasming. 

"Found it," he says quietly. "Rey, have you ever touched yourself?" 

"No."

"Then let me show you how to do it."

He tosses the washcloth aside and inexplicably Rey finds her thighs parting. She watches with tangible apprehension as he moves his massive hand over the little thatch of curls that obscures her more sensitive parts from prying eyes and nudges his pinky against the same thing that had forced her legs to twitch subconsciously. 

"Right here, Rey. Touch yourself for me." And he moves her hand to right where his was and covers it with his own, leaving her no choice but to obey. 

She flicks at the little spot and jumps. That did not feel good. It felt like all of her nerves protested at once, too much and somehow not enough, as though a promise of something more hovered nearby.

"Good. Again. Avoid touching your clit directly."

_Is that what this little nub is called?_

Rey touches its edges and yes, this feels much better than pressing against it without any sort of warning. Warmth floods her chest and works its way down until it rests near her pelvis. 

"Faster, darling. I want you to come for me."

And Rey does not understand, but she does as he says and suddenly her lower half seizes up and she feels so _warm._  Too soon the man who she knows as Kylo is lifting her out of the tub by her waist and fetching a towel to dry her off. He rubs between her thighs and Rey twitches, not understanding what just happened and shocked that she obeyed his lecherous demands. 

"Very good, Rey. Very good."

She does not feel very good. 

* * *

_**Ben** _

Rey is very pretty when she's sleeping. 

He was very proud of her in the bathtub; her technique was sloppy and it was clearly her first time touching herself, for he assumes that living a life searching for sustenance and working for (almost literal) peanuts did not allow her much freetime to partake in self-pleasure. But he will have plenty of time to teach her. 

Rey shifts in his bed. He leans forward in the dining chair he had dragged up, tenting his fingertips and raking his eyes upon her unconscious form hungrily. Yes, she had done well. 

He recalls how he had given her a false name.  _Kylo Ren._ It's all for the best, of course. Rey has no need to wonder why he remains in solitude, save for the occasional visits that Hux and Phasma pay him. She's far too precious to spend a day fussing over him as he does her. He will not allow it. 

Still, there is no internet access, so she could not search his name if he had given her his true one. But there is always a chance that his perceptive little Rey would have caught him on the news at some point, and he cannot risk her fearing him any more than she already does. 

Rey yawns. Ben's heart aches. 

He cannot bring himself to wake her, no matter how beautiful her hazel doe's eyes will look blinking up at him. So he sidles up beside her on the opposite side of the bed, pulls her flush against his chest, and falls asleep as he is filled with the most intense sense of peace he has ever felt in his life. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL WELL WELL... HOW THE TURNTABLES... WHAT IS KYLO HIDING FROM THE WORLD (besides pretty girls)


	4. La Vérité

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two lessons for Rey in one day. Poor girl. 
> 
> 1\. Don't argue with your kidnapper, and  
> 2\. Don't trust your kidnapper.

_**Rey** _

Rey is drowning. Rey is drowning, and no matter how quickly she seems to swim, she cannot reach the surface of an inky-black sea. Then she realizes that Kylo had rolled on top of her in his sleep. Rey wails, pushing him off, and freezes when he shifts and  _something_ prods at the space between her thighs. What is that? 

She squirms and manages to move out from under his tremendous weight, looking at a bulge in his pants. She has a very good idea of what it must be, but she's never seen one in person, and... 

"Come back to bed, Rey. You need to sleep." His voice is rough with both disuse and something else that's altogether foreign to her. 

"I'm not tired." She's about to stand up and go  _somewhere_ (anywhere but a bedroom with him while she's still  _very naked_ ) when one of his massive arms shoots out and pulls her back down. He settles it around her waist. 

The bulge is now pressed into the small of her back, and Rey scoots forward to avoid making contact with it. His grip tightens. 

"You were so good yesterday. Now, can't you behave and lie still like a good girl?" His lips are trailing along the shell of her ear, and Rey shivers. But it's not out of fear, and that confuses her. 

"Don't call me that." She's happy that her captor can't see how red her cheeks are. 

"You are a good little girl, though." Now his mouth is firmly planted on the spot where her jaw transitions into her neck. "I'm only telling the truth. Now stop fidgeting."

Rey obeys if only to avoid any sort of ire that she's yet to experience. As loath as she is to admit it, Kylo has been nothing but kind to her. If not more than a bit unsettling. But it could be worse, and for that she's grateful.

She could perhaps feel more gratitude if she wasn't pressed to his chest, with what she dimly recalls as being dubbed an "erection" rubbing into her back. Rey has never had the opportunity to have a proper introduction to copulatory methods, nor to her own sensitive parts. She has no doubt that if she calls attention to the firm pressure she feels situated awkwardly between her and Kylo, he will undoubtedly spring and turn it into some sort of twisted "lesson." 

Like the one from last night.

After he had taken her from the tub, legs as good as jelly, he had toweled her down and sat on the rim of the tub with her in his lap. She does not understand his fascination with taking care of her, but perhaps it stems from his knowledge of her past. Of the fact that she has never had anyone to so much as hug in the fourteen years she remembers being on the streets. But she knows that his behavior is not normal. In fact, Rey does not believe that his intentions are wholly pure. Despite her lack of experience, she knows that forbidding people from access to clothing as some sort of perverse "punishment" and collaring them like a pet is not indicative of a pure intent. In fact, it's downright unsettling. His behavior either stems from a lack of understanding how "love" works at the very  _best,_ and even that's generous; or, more likely, a very tenuous grip on sanity at the worst.

"You're very quiet, love. Please talk. You have a wonderful voice." Irrationally, she thinks he may have heard her thoughts. But that notion is quickly replaced with the realization that he had given her a pet name. Rey's toes curl. 

"I'm not tired, Kylo. I want to get up." Best not to allow him to indulge in whatever fantasies he may be having with her pinned against him any further.

He's quiet for a moment. Rey is about to repeat herself when he finally replies.

"Get up, then."

* * *

This is not what Rey had meant by wanting to get up, but she should have expected him to turn it into some sort of weird lesson. 

He'd dragged her down to one of the undoubtedly many sitting-rooms littering his mansion. Before she could protest, he had gathered both of her wrists in one of his massive hands and tied them together before looping another rope around the one binding her wrists, tossing the end over a chandelier and pulling down, forcing her hands up. Then he had dragged a chair over and there he's sat for the past twenty minutes, nearly unblinking and leaning on his tented fingertips with interest. Her position is forcing her to stand on her toes to avoid any more discomfort. It's humiliating and painful and his gaze on her naked body has her turning red. 

Then he rises, disappearing from her peripheral. She thinks he's going to leave when she feels his presence hovering at her back. She squirms when the pad of one of his fingertips trails a path upwards from the subtle swell of her hips to the lacking curve of her waist and finally pausing at her breast. Rey watches with mingled horror and curiosity as he repeats the movement with his other hand. Then he takes a nipple, pebbled due to the cold draftiness of the room, between his forefinger and thumb and squeezes.

Rey  _keens_. That was not a sound that should have come out. But when he does it to her other nipple, she bucks against him, losing her footing and yelping.

"Don't squirm, Rey. I don't want you to hurt yourself." But his voice is deep and ragged and Rey is suddenly made aware of the fact that he is very, very close and the bulge in his pants is more prominent than it was before, in the bed. 

She struggles not to lose her footing again but he is set on torturing her like this, lips pressed to her temple as he kneads and pinches and works her nipples until she's nearly crying, that same warm feeling from the tub gathering in the pit of her belly. 

And then the floodgates open.

Her back arches, and her legs are shaking, and Kylo might be laughing or crying or maybe that's just her because she can't feel  _anything_ in this moment besides his hands and his lips and his  _erection--_

"I thought--" she gasps as he cuts her down, pulling her into his chest and kissing her temple, "I thought that you could only feel that if you touched yourself down there."

Her legs are still twitching when he nudges her thighs apart and cups the entirety of her slit, brushing his forefinger over what he'd called her  _clit_. Rey hides her face in his shoulder as he flicks it again, a small, unbidden whimper dripping past her lips. "Like this?"

"Yes," she gasps. She does not want this and would push him away if she didn't want this. It's an oxymoron that confuses her but, as long as he continues to touch her like he is, she's more than willing to grow comfortable with it.

"Rey, there are many ways you can please yourself. But I want to make this very clear. You are not going to touch yourself unless I tell you to." His words are harsh but his voice is gentle and soft and very, very soothing. It shouldn't be. But it calms her nerves and she doesn't fight when he lifts her up. 

She justifies her lack of protest at being so very, very tired, at being drained from his ministrations. Well, at least she'll go back to sleep now. Rey gives a small, choked laugh at the absurdity of it all and promptly falls into unconsciousness.

* * *

_**Ben** _

He is very, very lucky that Rey is asleep when Armitage Hux shows up.

"You didn't call, Solo."

Ben's face twists up in a scowl and he turns to find Hux looking at him with a similarly disgusted expression. "I was busy."

"With what?" God, Ben would love to bash his upturned nose in. Hux is lucky that his wife walks in just then.

He likes Gwen Phasma much more than her ratlike husband. Unlike Hux, whom Ben would be very pleased if he suddenly decided to  _drop dead_ in his kitchen right there, he views her with respect.

"Don't push him, Hux. You're his lawyer, not a petulant goddamn child. And you," she says, pointing to Ben, "need to obey the terms of your release. If it weren't for us you'd be right back in prison."

She's right, but he'll be damned if he acknowledges it. "Is that all you came for? To remind me of how my livelihood rests on the shoulders of the two of you?"

"We came for dinner. Because Phasma wants us to get along."

"This isn't a fucking playdate, Armitage. It's  _business._ But yes," Phasma says. "We're here for dinner."

Ben pales.  _God, what if Rey comes down while they're still here? What if they hear her?_ He has to bring her down to prevent her unwanted discovery. 

"Give me a minute." And he darts up the staircase faster than he's ever done so in his life.

He all but kicks open the door to his bedroom and pauses to look at sweet little Rey, always so precious in sleep, and shakes her awake so violently she starts screaming.

"This is mine! You can't have it, I won't be able to eat--"

"Rey, it's me, please calm down." And her eyes lose that frenzied tint to them. He'll have time to worry about her nightmares later. She stills, and he gloats inwardly at the fact that his voicing his presence seemed to soothe her. "We have visitors. Do you want dinner? Clothes?"

"Yes. But please don't tie me to the chair this time," she says quietly, and his heart aches. Oh, but she looks so beautiful tied up. 

"I can't make any promises," he says, and it's meant to be a joke but her eyes reflect the horror she feels at his words. "I was kidding, Rey. But please, play the part of my girlfriend. I promise that if you do I'll let you leave."

He's not going to let her leave, but she doesn't have to know that. She perks up immediately at the prospect of escape and oh, that hurts him, but he has more pressing matters to deal with. Like finding her something to wear.

So he dashes down to his mother's old room and picks out a dress. It's old-fashioned but it will have to do. And somehow, when he throws it at her and she slips it on, she looks more radiant than ever. He leaves her to tend to his lawyer and parole officer.

"My girlfriend was spending the night. She's coming down in just a moment," he says to Hux and Phasma, who have been chatting by the fireplace idly. 

"Girlfriend?" Hux is incredulous and Ben clenches his fists, the knuckles turning white. "How much did you pay her?"

"Nothing. But I've paid you thousands, and she's done far more than you ever have." Hux's face falls and Ben privately gloats at the sight of his face turning red with embarrassment. 

"Kylo?" He hears Rey's little melodic voice wafting down the staircase. "I can't walk in these shoes." 

He desperately wants to carry her down as he's become so accustomed to doing, but he takes the stairs two at a time to get to her side as quickly as possible and offers her his arm. Her little hands are so soft, wrapped around his bicep, but he  _really_ needs to focus. She wobbles and presses herself to his side, using him as support as she walks in his mother's heels. When he leads her into the dining room, Hux and Phasma both look awed. 

"I'll be damned," Phasma breathes. "You weren't kidding. And you didn't even have to kidnap her."

Well. 

Hux offers her his hand. "Armitage Hux. I'm your boyfriend's lawyer."

Rey's eyes look up at him in narrowed suspicion. "Lawyer?"

"He never told you why he lives alone?" 

"No," Rey says, voice growing quiet. "He didn't."

"Hux," both Ben and Phasma warn at the same time, but Hux sees an opening to ruin Ben's life and he is not going to miss out on this opportunity. Rey's grip tightens on his bicep and he would sing at the feeling if the circumstances weren't so fucking  _dire._

"He lives alone because he's under conditional house arrest. My wife is his parole officer." 

"Kylo, what did you do?" Rey's voice is horrified. He avoids her gaze because he knows how frightened she must look. Apparently fingering someone twice is not enough to breed permanent trust. Maybe he will have to alter his technique. But after this, she must know that she can never leave. He prefers to think that  _this_ is why she seems so frightened. That she will be stuck here. With him. That's not so bad.

"Attempted homicide and aggravated assault of his own father."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the plot is now like a thick porridge with how thick it is. its thick like kylos dick. its so thick you cant even see through it, its thick like morning fog, its thick li


	5. Débauché

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey gets acquainted with her new best friend.

_**Ben** _

"That seems like an excessive reaction, Ben." Phasma surveys Rey's bound, unconscious form with some degree of interest. "Will she be able to eat?"

"Yes," Ben replies, tightening the final knot around her wrists and securing her to the chair before rising up from his haunches. "She'll be fine. I'm going to feed her." Ben recalls how he had promised Rey not to bind her again, and tries not to think about how betrayed her wide, hazel eyes will appear when she regains consciousness. 

After Hux had so pettily revealed his secret, Rey had slumped over, fainting again. He knows that his little thief is no flower, but she's had a stressful few days and he is in no way surprised at her reaction. Besides, she looks so very precious in her sleep. So Ben finds himself unable to complain. 

"You have no issues with this?" Hux is toeing the line between mirth and anger, and his face is a delicate shade of puce as a consequence of his indecisiveness. Ben would laugh if he weren't so concerned for Rey; he leans down to kiss her temples, a gesture that his mother commonly expressed and one that he's come to forever associate with love and peace. 

"Hux, if you want to drag your client back to prison and ruin your spotless reputation, as well as sully my own by implying that as his parole officer I was too incompetent to do my job, then be my guest." And just like that, Ben essentially has the go-ahead to keep Rey, given by the only people who could incriminate him. Phasma is a very good woman and her logic is infallible.

Hux looks from Rey, whose head is lolling forward and onto her chest, to Ben, who props her head up so that she doesn't harm herself, and finally to his wife, amused and irritatingly right in her justification for this whole debacle. His anger abates almost immediately, replaced by a clinical calm that Ben has seen only a few times, always in the courtroom. "Fine. Do what you want."

Ben is very, very lucky that neither of them question the collar or even the fake name. He assumes that they're trying to ignore it. 

"You did promise us dinner, though." Phasma, ever the pragmatist, tries to clear the air in the room. It's especially difficult as Rey has begun snoring; quiet, endearing little sniffs that has Ben's heart swelling with unabashed adoration. 

"I did no such thing," Ben protests, but he moves to the kitchen anyway. It's been more than a week since anyone but Rey has come to call, so his food supply is... Meager, at best. Usually, he has Mitaka, a jumpy kid who was stupid enough to become his errand-runner, pick things up for him, but he hasn't dropped by with the usual supplies just yet. In any case, Ben has some leftovers in the refrigerator and sets about heating them up. When he's done, he tosses them onto cheap styrofoam plates and dumps them in front of his guests. 

"You're an excellent host, Solo," Hux says icily, but Ben ignores him and takes his seat by Rey's side, who is still sleeping. He shakes her gently and she fixes him with a bleary, sleepy-eyed gaze. 

"Am I home now?" Rey is still disoriented. Ben brushes the loose hair away from her forehead and presses his lips to the soft skin there. 

"Yes, love. You're home." 

His voice seems to rouse something in her and her eyes fly open. She jerks upwards, finds herself bound again, and looks to Hux and Phasma with an imploring glint flashing in her gaze. They might as well be twiddling their thumbs for all the help they intend to give her, and for that Ben is immeasurably grateful. He cannot lose her, for she  _does_ something for him. He has not had a fit since her arrival, and to prevent frightening her, he does not intend on having one.

"You said you would let me go after this!"

"People lie, Rey. Initially I was going to release you once I was sure you had been taught the appropriate lessons, but..." and Ben nuzzles the crook of her neck, enjoying the way she squirms as he trails off. "I'm reconsidering that notion."

* * *

_**Rey** _

Rey feels like she might vomit. She probably would, actually, if she had food in her stomach. She contents herself with leaning away from Kylo--no, Ben--but, predictably, he follows her movement and kisses her neck as if this were normal in any way. 

His  _parole officer_ and  _lawyer_ both seem as crazy as he. Crazy, corrupt, or very, very greedy, as Rey has no doubt that Kylo--Ben--is paying them to keep quiet about the girl he's keeping locked up like a pet. And with his latest revelation about her release (or lack thereof), Rey's desperation skyrockets.

"You can't keep me here!" Rey knows it's fruitless to protest, but she can try. Maybe his love, however obsessive and dark it may be, will allow him to see how wrong this is.

"I'm not giving you the option." And now, Ben is irritated with her and with her inability to submit. She will never submit, no matter how oddly comforting his voice may be nor how his touches elicit something deep, primal, and previously untapped in her. 

"Can't you just untie m-"

"No." Ben moves back, and Rey is frightened at how intense his gaze is. Something in it has warmth flaring up in the pit of her belly and she tries to look away, but he tilts her chin up and holds it there so that she's forced to look up at him. "I like you tied up. You look very cute when you struggle. And besides," he says huskily, resting his forehead against hers with his hand still underneath her chin, "like this, I can make sure that you won't leave me." 

Rey's breath comes out in soft, short pants. This shouldn't be as nice as it is. She should be terrified, but she's not, and that realization in itself is what frightens her.

"I just... Ben," she whines when he kisses the corner of her mouth. "The rope. It's too tight and it hurts."

"Good. Another lesson, then." 

She doesn't dare ask what it's teaching her besides the fact that he is a very, very strange man. 

Rey thinks that he may kiss her on the lips this time, and she's almost eager besides every fiber of her being screaming out in protest when the blonde woman clears her throat. And just like that, the spell is broken, and Rey is left sweating as she feels the beginnings of a bruise forming on her neck from Ben's previous ministrations. "Well. Lovely dinner, Solo. I think that Hux and I will be taking our leave and let you two have some time to yourself."

Rey is about to call after them as they all but tear out of the dining room when Ben wraps a palm around her mouth. "Hush. They won't try to tear us apart. There's no need to be worried, love." Then he's working the ropes off of her wrists and Rey is telling herself to  _fight,_ but he's hefting her up in his arms as though she weighs nothing to him (malnutrition has kept her light, but in his ridiculously muscular arms she doubts she feels heavier than a feather) and Rey is reminded of how very powerless she is in this whole situation.

"Let's get you out of these clothes." He carries her to his bedroom and sets her on her feet, gesturing to her. "Arms up." 

He pulls the dress off of her slender frame and balls it up, tossing it against the wall. 

"I didn't get to eat." Rey's stomach rumbles to affirm her hunger.

He seems to consider her words, but laughs instead of fetching her something to eat. "Do you remember what you felt earlier? Something poking you in the back, pressing against you, and perhaps awakening some sort of curiosity in you?"

Yes. "No."

"Then maybe we should get you acquainted with it." And without any further warning his pants drop, along with Rey's jaw.

She's never seen one of these in person. She's heard about them, and she's been curious, but whatever fantasies she's had did not prepare her for the real thing. Because Ben is massive, and Rey is sure that's he's larger than average. It's standing up at attention for some reason and before she realizes what's happening, he's gently pushing down on her shoulders to force her to sink to her knees. She's now eye-level with his cock and it seems even more intimidating than before.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Rey. Go ahead and touch it." Tentatively, she raises a shaking hand up and...

Pokes it.

"Don't play coy, Rey. With your mouth. This is your dinner." So that's what this is about. Rey squeezes her thighs together as warmth floods the space between them. Her cheeks feel absurdly hot. 

"God, you're too cute. Go on. Kiss it, love." And she does. She presses the gentlest of pecks to his tip, barely brushing the foreskin with her lips, and the groan that leaves him is downright animalistic. 

"Christ, Rey. You're too damn adorable." She looks up to find him gazing at her with affection in its purest form. What is happening to her? "Open up your mouth as wide as it can go. I promise that this won't hurt."

He'd said that if he wanted to report her to the police, he would have the first moment he laid eyes on her. So she knows that if he truly wanted to hurt her, he would have already. Rey doesn't trust him, but she trusts him with this. She parts her lips and closes her eyes, and Ben's hand is pressing against the back of her head, fingers threading in her hair and urging her forward. 

She tastes something salty on his tip first, and it has her recoiling. "Yuck." But his thumb strokes her cheek adoringly and she can't help but lean forward to try again.

This time, she ignores the strange saltiness and presses forward as much as she can without gagging. Rey opens her eyes and he's still got so much left. "Go on, love. I want to see you nuzzling my pubes like a good little girl." 

Rey sighs around him, his deliciously dirty words plucking at her being and demanding a response from the space between her thighs. So she edges forward, and he's humming his approval as she finally reaches the end. Fuck, he's big. Rey is focusing all of her effort on trying not to gag, but then he's murmuring, "Rey, move your mouth around it. Move it in and out, but don't let it slip. You're doing wonderfully."

She obeys, the soft, insistent pressure of his hand tangled in her hair holding her but not forcing her. No, this is all of her own volition.

All too soon his grip turns painful and he's seizing up, pushing her as far as she can go.  _Something,_ that same salty  _something_ that she had tasted before floods her mouth and she's sure that some is leaking from the corners of her lips. It's too much and she feels dirty, debauched, when he purrs, "Swallow it."

She does just as she remembers that he's a convicted felon. 

God, what has she done?

What is happening to her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> her new best friend is kylos massive cock
> 
> (who's ready for the deflowering because it's coming next chapter)


	6. Deux Premières

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get kinky, Rey gets deflowered, and Ben remembers what love feels like.

_**Rey** _

"That wasn't so bad, Rey, now was it?" Rey blinks up at him in horror, less frightened of him and more of the fact that she's just blown a criminal and  _liked_ it. He crouches down to meet her gaze and Ben's thumb wipes away the saltiness dribbling down her chin. Her senses repossess her and she pushes him away forcefully, crawling away from him as he flashes her with the most betrayed glance she's ever seen. She almost apologizes when she remembers that this needs to stop. Now. 

"Don't touch me," Rey says fiercely. "Get away."

"Rey," he says softly, as if addressing a skittish pet not quite housebroken yet. Rey realizes that it's very probable that this is how he views her--like a pet. Like some sort of creepy forever-companion that would be content to be caged. 

"Stop talking to me like that. You don't get to tell me how to behave or what to do, and the fact that you think that you can is not just appalling but  _disgusting._ I cannot _believe_ that you think that kidnapping me has somehow given you that right!" Rey's chest is heaving. But she can't tell whether it's from her anger or her fear at the look that Ben is now giving her.

"Rey." His cock rests limply on his thigh as he rises to his full height, and Rey would laugh at the sight if she weren't suddenly so paralyzed with fear. She wants to cry with how absurd the whole situation is. "What happened to my good girl?"

"I'm not your good girl!"

Then he smiles, but it's lacking any sort of good will behind it. "That's right, Rey. You're  _not_ being a good girl. But you are mine." And then Ben starts moving towards her. Rey scrambles to her feet and steps back as he advances. All too soon, she hits the wall and her wrists are pinned to either side of her head as he bears down on her, lips brushing her neck. A low hum of approval leaves his mouth as he touches the cold metal of the collar. "See? All mine." 

" _Let me go!_ " 

"Stop struggling," he growls. "Or I may have to resort to harsher methods."

"Like you aren't punishing me enough?" Rey is having difficulty not crying, especially seeing as how his cock is hardening against her belly. He's going to do the unthinkable. Thus far she's been a willing, if not begrudging, participant in all of his lessons, but if he's implying what she thinks he is...

"I haven't even begun to punish you, pet." And there the word is finally uttered. That's what she is to him. A pet. A little doll for him to do what he pleases with and to bend to his will. Rey has the sudden and horrifying image of herself bound and shoved in a cage as he dangles the key before her, promising to release her once she's learned her lesson. If this doesn't stop that may very well become a reality as he's very prone to tying her up whenever he pleases. (In the desperation of the moment, Rey refuses to think about how she feels when he does that--very, very warm.) He grabs her by the waist and she squeaks when he tosses her onto the bed, where she bounces and crawls away from him.

"Get back here," he hisses. He drags Rey back by her ankles and she kicks at him, but he only murmurs something about her being  _cute_ _in her denial._ He gathers both of her wrists and binds them together and she shrieks. 

"Stop it!" 

"Are you testing me, Rey? Because I love a challenge." She buries her face in the comforter and screams, thankful that the rich fabric muffles her despair. She thinks he's going to enter her right then and there, but when she hears the creak of a drawer being opened, she looks at the source of the sound curiously. She can't see him. Is he going to leave her here like this? Bound and...

Wanting?

No, no! Rey does not want this! Then she feels his hand fist in her hair, yanking her head upwards and away from the blanket where she spots a puddle of drool staining the fabric. She yelps in surprised pain and then he's  _shoving something in her mouth._

Fuck, it hurts. It's too big and it's round and she jerks her head back and forth, flailing as his anger grows. "Stop. Moving." 

She bites down on his finger as hard as she can, and she breaks the skin. Instead of showing any sort of indication that he may be in pain, Ben merely laughs. He releases her hair and her mouth fits around the gag, and he yanks her head back up with the straps of it before tightening it to the point of pain. He's never done this before and Rey might start crying if she could remember how to. Because, despite all of her best efforts, she feels very warm. 

He hums. "God, you look adorable like that. I love your voice, but you're just too  _mouthy_. Oh," he purrs. Rey hears fabric being ripped--the dress?--and suddenly there's a pressure at her back as Ben straddles her from behind. "You have issues making eye-contact as well, Rey. Should I show you what it's like not to see?" He ties the fabric around her eyes, blindfolding her.

Rey whimpers, but it's a pitiful, needy whine that leaves her gagged lips. Her cheek flops against the comforter as he lifts her up by the waist, plopping her down in the center of the bed she's grown familiar with in the past few days. This is very bad.

* * *

_**Ben** _

Oh, this is very good. His little Rey is  _dripping_ despite her painful words only minutes earlier. He shoves her thighs apart with his knee and leans down to inspect her slit, finding her completely drenched. Good. 

He ought to keep her trussed up like this more often. Robbed of her sight and only allowed the most muffled of whines through the gag, she looks positively debauched as her sweet, soft ass wiggles in a subconscious expression of her arousal. "If you do as I say, I'll remove the gag." She nods.

"I'm going to touch you." And touch he does, for his finger plunges inside of her entrance without any further warning.

Rey bucks against the sudden intrusion as he moves it in and out, curling it to find the rough spot nestled deep within her pussy that he  _knows_ will have his little thief sobbing with desire. He leans over her, crushing her to the bed as she whimpers. He kisses her cheek, then the spot just underneath the blindfold, then her temples, then her neck, and he would continue if it weren't for the way her body seems to still. She's about to orgasm.

No. This will not do. This is about punishment, not pleasure. So he withdrawals his finger and licks it clean. She wails, pushing against him. He brings one hand down upon her bottom and she mewls lewdly. So his little thief likes his punishments, then. Ben can work with that.

But he's still not going to let her come.

He continues his ministrations--one finger in, then two, then he pulls them out as she's on the brink of her orgasm, and rinse and repeat--until he's sure that she's sobbing. His cock is weeping just as she is. It's time.

"I'm going to enter you. Keep still. I promise it won't hurt." And despite her actions earlier she nods, and he kisses her softly. He cannot stay angry at her. Not when she's behaving herself so well.

He's about to push into her when he thinks that he desperately wants to hear her full, wanton cries, wants to see her pretty hazel eyes rolled back as she wails his name, falling apart on his cock. He rips off her blindfold and she blinks, momentarily disoriented. Then he pulls out her gag and a healthy heaping of drool dribbles down her chin. It should disgust him, but it's somehow endearing to see her so confused and vulnerable.

And needy. Very, very needy. "Do you want my cock now?" 

"N-no, please," she whispers. He flips her onto her back and nuzzles the valley of her breasts, inhaling deeply. She says no, but her pussy says  _yes._ She is clearly  _painfully_ aroused, so much so that when he pulls her hips up to slap her pretty ass again, her entrance clenches and he can see her wetness pooling on the comforter at the contact. He has never in his life seen a woman so desperate.

So he scratches her unvoiced itch. He holds her hips and pushes into her slowly so that she can feel every massive inch as her walls stretch, struggling to accommodate his girth. "Ben," she whines. "Ben, Ben, I-- Please!" 

"Please, what?"

"S-stop," she says pathetically, her cheeks so red their color could rival that of Hux's hair. Hux. The thought of him nearly kills his mood but he can't stop now, not as he's claiming of Rey what's rightfully his.

"You don't mean that, love. I can tell that you adore this. But it's so cute how you think that I don't know how this makes you feel. You feel hot. And you need to come."

Her eyes are glossy with unshed tears. "Please, Ben, I--"

"What?"

"I want to come," she whispers. Ben can hear her perfectly, but he wants her admission loud and clear. 

"What was that, dearest? I couldn't hear you."

"I want to come," she repeats, louder this time but no less embarrassed. Ben kisses her cheek gently. Oh, how he loves his little thief. She's so very precious, so pure. But no longer as innocent as she was when he first seized her.

"Then I'm going to fuck you long and hard, and you may only come after I have. Is that understood?"

"Yes, please, just let me come," she begs. 

So he pulls his hips back and snaps into her. Rey's voice rings out, high and clear, as he repeats the motion over and over. He can feel her pain morph into pleasure. Yes, she is most certainly a virgin. And he is very, very glad that he is her first.

He looks down at their joined bodies and all but growls at the sight that greets him, for she's so tiny and he's so large that he can see her stomach bulge with the outline of his cock. It's small, but it's there. He runs his hand down it and thrusts into her again just to see it move. At this sight he feels himself seizing up and he lifts her up, crushing her to his chest as he spills his seed into her little, shaking body. When he's done, he pulls out and watches with rapt attention as his essence dribbles from her reddened cunt, onto the all-but-ruined comforter. It's a sight to behold, his ruined little thief. Then he remembers his promise. He flicks her clit with his thumb once, twice, three times and she's suddenly shouting his name, grasping at the sheets as her back arches with the intensity of her orgasm. Ben leans forward to kiss her neck at the space right beneath the collar.

"Did that hurt?" He's suddenly very, very worried for his Rey. She had to be punished, but... He has no intentions of hurting her. 

"Yes. At first. I didn't want that." A pause. "But... I liked it anyway." Another pause. "I hate you."

He holds her face in his hands, her cheeks red and sweat beading on her forehead. Little wisps of hair curl around her face when he leans down to ever-so-gently kiss her lips for the first time. He's kissed her everywhere but  _here_ and he is very glad that he's taken the time to finally do so. Her mouth is soft and pink and she tastes like sunshine and bliss and  _happiness_. He will forever associate the word with Rey, with his darling little thief, who failed to rob his home but stole his heart. God, if that isn't a cheesy analogy, but he's fucked if it isn't true. He releases her mouth as gingerly as he had taken it and rests his forehead against hers.

"That was my first kiss," she whispers. 

"I know, love." And the word means something to him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it is december 15th, the day of the release of star wars: episode 8: the last jedi. everyone is sitting in their seats with bated breath. the title rolls up. people begin to clap. everyone is excited. but wait. whats this? snoke? sitting in front of a completely naked kylo and rey? he gestures to them.  
> "adam," he says to kylo,  
> "eve," he says to rey,  
> "fuck each other raw"  
> rian johnson laughs in the back. "live fast die free fuck antis," he says as his diet coke spills into his lap


	7. Soumission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey realizes that she's stuck with Ben and agrees to submit. In other news, who knew Ben was such a practical joker?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not too happy w this one but here you go (law school is murdering my ass!!!) 
> 
> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**_Rey_ **

Rey doesn't wake up immediately. Her body is tired and deeply sated as she dreams about what constituted her first kiss. He'd taken that along with her virginity, but surprisingly, she finds that she doesn't... Mind. And that concerns her, but really, she doesn't have the energy to care. In fact, she finds herself snuggling back into Ben's large chest when something cold gets lodged in the space between her back and his front.

Oh, no. She jerks upwards and finds her movement stilled by  _something_ attached to the collar. 

Ben has chained her to the bed by a fucking  _leash._ Her cheeks flush, and she should be angry. But he groans and pulls her down again, laving wet kisses on her cheeks as she sputters. How can he rob her of her virginity and any remnant of her former agency and  _still_ behave as though this is normal? 

He leans over her while still situated firmly at her back, cupping her cheeks gently and kissing her lips again. She tries not to think about how soft they are. About how nice they felt last night, after he had so brutally taken her. After she had said  _no_ and he had continued and she had  _liked_ it. His thumb brushes at the spot between her thighs and comes back red.

"That's right," he murmurs. "I forgot that women bleed after their first time." Rey blinks away her frustration at being rendered so helpless as he pulls away, missing the warmth he brought dearly. She shouldn't, but she does, and that seems to be the theme of this whole...

Affair. Debacle.  _Vacation,_ Rey thinks, and kicks herself immediately afterwards.

"Where are you going?" Rey tries to follow him but she gets caught on the leash.  _Ah._ Still, there's something undeniably enticing about being chained like this. She hates it. Except she doesn't hate it. She likes it very, very much. 

"I'm going to clean you up. Hold on." And he comes back with a damp washcloth and some paper towels. Rey flops back down against the pillows as he nudges her thighs apart with his knee, leaning down to kiss the spot beside her belly-button and shushing her as she giggles. He sponges away the blood, wiping away the excess dampness with the paper towels and tossing both into the wastebasket not too far away from the massive bed. Rey is almost frightened when she realizes how she doesn't  _care_ that he's even robbed her of her ability to handle her own menstrual cycle, probably brought about by the extreme stress she's been under.

"Why?" She says quietly after he's been staring at her intently for a while. At his questioning glance, she begins gesturing to the chain keeping her tethered to the bed. "Why this?

"I wanted you to be comfortable. If you stay here, you'll be warm and safe and cared for. You won't have to worry about visitors or anyone trying to steal you away from me. I love you so much, Rey. I just want you to be happy. Please let me make you feel happy and loved." 

Rey blinks away tears she didn't even know she was about to shed. He kidnapped her, raped her (is it still rape if she said no but really, really liked it? Rey has no idea), has tied her up again and again, has robbed her completely of her agency, and is now talking about keeping her happy and safe? The fact that he has two extremes that he sways between in her presence scares her, because she never knows what to expect. And yet he's never truly hurt her. 

 _Does_ he know what's best for her? Rey reflects on his actions with regards to her.

She is fed and looked after to an obsessive extent. He kisses her and cuddles her and he's done so much for her. So much  _to_ her. And Rey has to admit that after the life she's led, it is more or less a culture shock to be stripped of her independence but liberating nonetheless.

Oh. He's nuzzling her neck like some great big puppy.

"Okay," she says softly. Because if this is the life she's going to lead from now on, she might as well get used to it. And he'd said from the beginning that she's going to have to earn her privileges by behaving herself. She's going to play along. And she's already liking it.

"Huh?" He looks up quickly, some of his long hair getting caught in her mouth. She spits it out and nearly laughs at the sight of his face. He is completely  _shocked._ "What... Rey? What do you mean?"

"I said okay," she repeats herself. "I... You have my permission to take care of me." He rests his forehead against hers, and she looks up into his eyes, deep brown and flecked with gold. He has very pretty eyes. Slowly, she moves her arms up and hugs him. 

This is odd. Fuck, what is she doing? But after last night, she knows that there is simply no use in prolonging the inevitable. Rey is scared. She tricks herself into thinking that it's the unpleasant guarantee of her eventual submission that has her uneasy, but a very small part of Rey's brain knows that it's the fact that she may be falling in love with him that she's truly frightened of. 

* * *

_**Ben** _

He had no choice last night. He had to leash her. But Ben must admit that she looks absolutely precious with the metal around her pale, pretty throat, decorated with little bruises from his mouth and teeth, and the thick chain connected to it that's tethered to a bedpost. He could get her a new collar, one with lace and silk and a small tinkling bell that he's sure she would love. 

Especially seeing as how she's finally agreed to let him take care of her. Of course, he had intended on doing so for as long as possible, but it's nice to receive her consent nonetheless. Unlike last night. But he  _knows_ that Rey had wanted it--she'd even said herself that she liked it. 

Along with the admission that she hated him. That had hurt, of course, but in his heart he knows that his pretty little thief hadn't truly meant it. How could she hate him when he's been so kind, so accommodating with her? How can he hate her when she's just answered all of his prayers with her unthinking words?

He feels his face split into a smile at the way her thin, slender arms wrap around his neck and pull him close. She's like a salve for his soul, she is; he can forget all of his crimes when he's holding her, when she's tucked away in his bedroom like this, safe and hidden from the world that's hurt her so very dearly. He's given up on teaching her a lesson for despite her complete submission, she's become the teacher. Rey has taught him how to love again.

After the loss of his mother he had fallen into a deep despair and had eventually taken it out on his father, that of whom he hasn't seen since he testified against him in court. Ben can hear his damning words ringing in his ears even as Rey's fingertips thread in his hair, soothing him as though she can hear his thoughts. He smiles against her cheek and huffs out a laugh.

"I love you, Rey. I love you." 

"I know," she murmurs. Her soft little lips peck his cheek and he almost cries. This is everything he's ever wanted.

* * *

This is not what Ben had wanted.

"Mitaka," he hisses, pinching the bridge of his nose between his forefinger and thumb, "you inept  _fuck._ How many times have I told you that you need to get  _whole_ milk?" 

Mitaka is quaking. "I'm sorry, sir."

"No, you're not. I don't know why I bother. Oh, that's right," he growls, leaning closer to the shivering young man. "I bother because I'm a good guy. It's the only reason that I continue to put up with you." Dopheld Mitaka flinches. His fear would be amusing if he had more time to fuck with him, but he desperately wants to crawl back into Rey's waiting arms, especially since she's bleeding and probably needs him to sponge at her thighs again. He smiles as he thinks about how she might look bundled up in his blankets all by her lonesome, lips parted as her little breasts rise and fall in an even pattern. Perhaps she'll be laying on her side. That would be absolutely adorable, tiny fists balled up in the hollow between her breasts. He's so lost in his fantasy that he doesn't even hear Mitaka talking.

"Sir," he says, voice despairing. "Sir, please." 

"What?"

"Sir, I just said that I'm sorry. It won't happen again." His eyes flash to Ben's pants. Did he look too disheveled for this stupid little boy? Sure, he'd had to toss on last night's clothing, but still. He pays the man to pick up his groceries, not to grant Ben some sort of approval. Then he notices the bulge in his jeans. Oh. Ben's growing hard thinking about his little Rey. All chained up. Yes, that was a very good idea. Does Mitaka think that this is about him?

Might as well scare him into doing things correctly while also getting what he needs for what he has planned for Rey. Because while he grows even  _harder_ at the thought of her swollen with his seed, he can't risk her getting pregnant. That would require medical attention and hospitals and he does  _not_ want anyone looking at Rey's sensitive parts, even to bring a child into the world. He doesn't even know if it's possible with how malnourished she is; hopefully the food high in calories he'd ordered Mitaka to purchase will bring her to a healthy weight. 

This isn't even calling into consideration the fact that he can't leave his house except to visit Armitage and Gwen. So there's also his pesky sentence of partial house-arrest to consider. 

Mitaka is still shaking before him. Ben leans close. "You're not sorry, but you will be. Go get the milk. And pick up some condoms."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im laughing poor mitaka
> 
> (the last part is for that comment that implied that ben was going to ask for condoms for rey, but mitaka would think that they were for him. s/o you the real og)


	8. Dévouement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mitaka gets a show and we get some Ben Solo backstory. Also, Rey doesn't know what love is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> s/o to racheymaybe for the dick riding dinner idea...... strawberries are a sexy food guys

_**Ben** _

Mitaka is back before he can so much as kiss Rey's sleeping face. God, she'd looked so precious. So very _content._ He was considering waking her up if only to feel her soft arms slip around his neck again when he heard the knock. Mitaka, as always, flails when faced with his anger at being interrupted.

"I p-picked them up, sir," he says, flinching when he leans over to snatch the condoms from his sweating palm. Ben nods approvingly.

"Excellent. The milk?"

"H-here," Mitaka replies, and Ben nearly laughs out loud at how violently he's shaking because the milk is sloshing about in its container as he brandishes it like a shield. "Whole, sir." Ben checks the label--it is indeed whole.

"Thank you. Go put away the groceries."

"I will, sir," Mitaka nods, ducking past his towering form to all but flee to the pantry. Ben watches him go and, when he's out sight, rushes back to Rey. Because now he has time to observe her in all of her innocent beauty while she sleeps.

In sleep, she does not look every bit the debauched little girl that she is. She looks pure. Sweet. Ben draws up a chair, pulling it beside the bed, and takes a seat as he strokes her hair back, and then presses his lips to her ear and hums a tuneless lullaby he remembers his mother singing to him as a boy.

His mother. In a way, she's the source of all of his troubles, although it certainly wasn't her fault. She never asked to be abandoned by a faithless husband, nor to be assassinated; and she certainly never asked for her funeral to turn into the shitshow that it did, with more police cruisers and ambulances than mourners by the end of the day. But he wouldn't change the relationship that he had with her for the world because she taught him the most important thing that he knows.

When he was very young, his mother would draw him into her lap and hum the same little lullaby, teaching him small lessons about love and kindness in language that a four-year-old could understand. _"Do you know the phrase that if you love something, set it free? Benny, don't do that. If you love something, chase after it. Make it yours."_ She wasn't speaking about people, of course, but rather his dreams and goals. But the message resonates with him to this day, after almost three years to the day of her murder.

"Ben?" Rey's little voice shakes him from his ruminations. Her eyes are tired and drooping and still one of the most beautiful things he's ever seen, their hazel bright despite her clear sleepiness.

"Yes, love, I'm here."

"I'm hungry."

* * *

While waiting for Mitaka to finish unloading the groceries, Ben reconsiders what he's planning to do. Rey sits at the foot of the table; the leash is still trailing along the ground, but, for now, she's free. He was torn between two desires, that of which was to hide her away and keep her all to himself, or to show her off in every way possible. If he shows her off, though, then everyone will know who she belongs to.

"Sir, I'm finished-" Mitaka is cut short as he looks at the undoubtedly strange scene before him. His employer, completely naked; and an equally naked young girl sat at the opposite end of the dining table, toes brushing the ground as she kicks back and forth, collared and leashed.

"Mitaka, go get me something sweet. Then sit next to Rey." Ben gestures to his little thief perched opposite him. Mitaka nods, ducks into the pantry, and emerges with strawberries, which he dumps before Ben. He then moves beside Rey, who nods politely in his general direction and promptly ignores him. Good girl.

"Dopheld Mitaka, go on and thank this girl. Be lucky that this is her and not you. I would not be so gentle with you." The young man flails, and Ben gestures to Rey, pulling his chair out and patting his lap. She hops up on it obediently, humming when he kisses her cheek.

"Are you ready?" He says softly. Rey nods, a slight incline of her head so as to be imperceptible to Dopheld Mitaka's unobservant eye (if his inability to pick up the right _anything_ is any indication), and Ben lifts her up by the waist.

And sets her right on his cock.

He looks down. God, it's still there: the little bulge that had driven him over the edge the night prior. Rey's cheeks are red as she stretches around him, whimpering softly when he tugs at one of her pretty nipples. Mitaka has one of the most horrified looks on his face that he's ever seen, and he was present when Ben beat his own father to the point of unconsciousness (and would have killed him if the police hadn't arrived).

"Mr. Solo!" Mitaka is no longer shaking, but he looks absolutely appalled at the display.

"Rey, are you still hungry?" He tucks his cheek against her temple and kisses the corner of her eyelid soothingly. His darling Rey nods quickly. So he takes a strawberry out of the carton set before him and holds it up to her lips; although her eyes are closed, she senses it and leans forward to bite at it. He rubs her belly approvingly, brushing against the bulge. Her breath hitches.

"Thank you, Ben," she says gratefully. And without warning, she leans forward to lick his fingers clean while riding him with enviable obedience. So continues this display: Ben feeds her, she licks him dry and moves herself up and down, and Mitaka grows steadily more uncomfortable.

All too soon, the carton is empty. Ben fed her the entirety of the carton of strawberries and her lips are stained red now. Ben swipes his thumb across her mouth and wipes it on Mitaka's shirt as the young man rushes by, looking utterly sick, his boyish face ashen.

"Make sure you pick up the right milk next time," Ben calls. Mitaka nearly trips on himself as the front door slams shut.

* * *

_**Rey** _

He's washing her again, but this time, there's not nearly as much arguing. Instead, she focuses on how his fingers knead her scalp, rubbing in the conditioner that his errand-runner had picked up. She pays attention to how his lips feel pressed to her temple as he rinses her off, on how gentle his massive hands feel rubbing her down and cleaning the space between her thighs. Rey is letting him take care of her, and it is so incredibly _liberating_ to have someone treat her like this. To take care of her. At some point she's stopped thinking of him stealing away her agency, and merely keeping her best interests at heart. She _could_ do things herself, it's true; but with someone like Ben to do them for her as well as treat her with such love, why would she want to?

Only a few days ago she would have shot herself for thinking such thoughts. She likes to think that she's merely have a more pragmatic approach to her...

New life.

Because, in a way, this is the life she's always dreamed of. She can ignore how suffocating it gets at times and how needy her captor is if it means that he continues to treat her like a little princess.

After his errand-boy had left, he had carried her up to the bedroom and... Well, fucked her good and proper. But this time, he let her come first, citing his duty to put her needs before his own.

"What are you thinking about? You're quiet. Are you alright?" And there he goes again. Rey is sitting in his lap as he towels her down, kissing her neck all the while, nose brushing against the collar. He rubs the cloth over her until she's pink, then takes special care to ensure that she's clean between her thighs. Then he begins to brush her hair. It curls gently as it dries--Rey has come to realize that he likes her hair down, for not once has it been up since that first bath.

"About this," she says softly when he repeats himself. He presses his lips to the crown of her head. Rey wonders if he can go more than a minute without kissing her in some way, shape, or form, but she's not complaining; the way he handles her makes her feel _loved_. For the first time in her life, Rey Kenobi feels needed. She feels wanted. For she knows that he must be violent considering his charges, but he has never, not once, hurt her. With the exception of her loss of virginity. But despite her staunch refusal of his advances, she had enjoyed it. "About this whole... Situation." She doesn't know how to describe it.

"What about it?" It's almost surreal how they're discussing things like a couple.

A _couple._ Rey's breath gets caught in her throat at that word. She doesn't know what they have or what this is. All she knows is that she enjoys his treatment. How he's taking care of her. Because she's never experienced anything like it in her life and she's certainly not about to refuse him any longer, if not for the sake of her own livelihood (but she knows that she isn't just playing along anymore).

Rey actually finds the thought of being his girlfriend... Pleasing. She's never had the luxury of so much as kissing anyone before Ben, so for her to start dating someone was completely out of the question, especially when living one day at a time, trying not to starve or get caught.

"I want you to be my boyfriend," Rey blurts out, and Ben stiffens beneath her.

"That's not a very kind joke, Rey," he says coldly, but his voice is shaking. One of his arms is wrapped around her waist, and she laces her fingers with the hand resting on her hip. He makes her feel very tiny.

He makes her feel safe.

And oh, isn't that ironic? That the man who kidnapped her and forced her into accepting him is now something that brings her comfort? He's warm and kind, but rough when he needs to be. He's a criminal but she's never experienced that side of him. He taught her how to love.

 _Does_ she love him? Rey doesn't know what love is. But maybe he can teach her.

"I'm not joking," she murmurs, leaning back to nuzzle the side of his neck. God, a little part of her brain is screaming at her that this is _beyond wrong,_ that she should be fighting him tooth and nail to escape, but she doesn't necessarily want to. Still, to appease the more (admittedly) sensible part of her being, she justifies her actions as being in the spirit of survival. But dating him is not exactly _necessary_ to do so.

No, she wants to date him. She wants to date her kidnapper.

"Rey," he says, strained.

"Please, Ben."

"I'll think about it." But he eases up and she can feel his smile against her temple. "I love you."

 _I think I may love you too._ "I know, Ben."

* * *

**_Ben_ **

Is she toying with him? Certainly the idea of being his little thief's boyfriend is tempting in the extreme, but he's worried that she may be playing him for a lovesick fool. Which he is, really. But he has no desire to allow her to take advantage of that.

So he had told her that he would consider her request. He loves her perhaps more than he can express. It's in the way that he carries her, how he looks at her, how he tucks her in and joins her when she falls asleep, like now. She's so little and warm. So soft beside him. Rey molds into his body perfectly and he would kill to keep her here, like this.

Ben is seriously considering getting her a new collar. One with matching bracelets, perhaps. God, that would look adorable. His beautiful, resourceful, precious little thief, all dressed up in a lace collar with a little bell attached and cuffs to go with it.

He doesn't dare to imagine that she may be coming to love him. Truly, he hasn't had anyone love him or care for him in years. Not since his mother died, anyway. And he's thrust into the past again.

His father had shown up for the first time in what felt like years just to pay his "respects" to the woman that he had abandoned. The woman that Ben remembers crying at night in a cold bed when he was young. Ben had asked that if he couldn't respect his wife in life, then why in death?

The memories are painful to relive, but Rey keeps him grounded.

She smells so _good_ after she's been washed; of course, it's his own doing as he's the one bathing her, but still. He has the sudden thought that she would look very cute in pink. Perhaps when he decides to dress her again, he'll buy her pink clothing. It's a very girlish and pretty color and he's sure that it will be lovely on her.

He likes that when his thoughts run away with him as they do so often, they're almost always about Rey--about what Rey should wear, what he might do with her, about what to feed her. If focusing on the tiny woman nestled in his arms keeps the nightmares away, then so be it.

Ben loves her so much. He's doing this out of his love for her and for her well-being--his poor Rey had been so mistreated by the world outside that it was surprising when she had fought him as she did. He drifts off thinking about her, dreams filled with her soft touch and warm presence that soothes his very soul. "I love you," he whispers, knowing that she's asleep.

* * *

He's so content that he doesn't notice the furious pounding at the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whos at the door? mormons? hux and phasma? the police? antis? jesus? probably the last one because yall need to quit sinning *prayer emoji* 
> 
> (OKAY GUYS so from here on out the updates might get sporadic, so if i don't update every day please don't worry! i'll do my best to keep you guys satisfied because i adore writing this, it's just that law school is fucking MURDERING ME and i want to die because im doing double duty on my ba in polisci and now law :') why did i do this to myself at least i have this fic to keep me going)


	9. Résolution de Problème

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben solves what he thinks is Rey's biggest problem. 
> 
> Rey is less than impressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry omfgggggg lotta law school shit, also my muse took a vacation and i called off my engagement so things have been crazy
> 
> this chapter is really violent but important, ive had it drafted for a while and im probably gonna end up adding more later as i am so wont to do so! 
> 
> enjoy, if u have any questions/comments/concerns/threats against my life feel free to drop down and leave them in in the comment box bc god knows i need them like air
> 
> and again im sorry for the late update but ill try to keep them steady from now on! <3

_**Ben** _

Ben is lucky that the knocking doesn't stir his precious Rey from her sleep; if it does, he will have the caller's hands for it. He untangles his limbs from Rey's, taking care not to rouse her and kissing her forehead as she snores softly before marching down to address the interloper. 

He intends to use his terrific height and glare to intimidate the individual who had felt the need to interrupt time spent with his sweet Rey. Being intimidating by nature is something that has served him well over the years, and truly whomever has the gall to call at such an hour is in for a treat. 

He is not expecting a rather ugly, portly man to be at his door. His sparse hair is combed over the dome of a sickly-pale head in greasy strings and his sweat drips like slime down his face, but there is an undeniable shrewdness to his eyes that has Ben leery of him. 

"Where is she?" Ben blinks. He's talking about Rey. Does this man think Rey is  _his?_

"I'm sorry, but you have the wrong house—"

"I know that she came here last. She told me she was going here, she always tells me where she's going because she knows what happens otherwise. So spare me the act. Where is she?"

Ben isn't nervous around this man. He's angry. Angrier than before. He's trying to take Rey away from him. 

"You can come inside and look if you want." At least his mother instilled in him a sense of politeness. "But whomever you're looking for isn't here. I would know if a girl was here because I live alone and have for a few years now."

Ben follows his movements warily. Somehow he needs to get this slug to the kitchen so he can dispose of him because, God help him,  _no one is taking his Rey._

His beady gaze is sweeping across everything in sight and everything of value. Ben feels scandalized as he moves from room to room and—

"What's this here?" Of course the interloper had to come across the pile of goods Rey had been trying to pilfer still lying upon the ground. He's too intuitive. Knows too much already. "Is it normal for you to leave things around like this?" 

Ben laughs, but it's without any mirth and sounds more like a bark. "I'm not sure you're qualified to know what my 'normal' is." The caller looks satisfyingly nonplussed and turns an even paler, sickly shade. 

"Rich little prick," he hears the slug utter. 

"Yes," Ben affirms cheerfully. "Perhaps I am." And then a plan forms in his head. "If you still have your doubts you can follow me and I'll give you a tour. Then, once you're no doubt satisfied, you can leave."

The man nods stiffly and Ben guides him to the kitchen. "Check behind the curtains. There's no girls hiding there. And the pantry," Ben gestures to with no small amount of showmanship, "is free of any corpses of young ladies."

"Lot of dishes for one man," the man remarks casually, but Ben catches the accusation. 

"I eat a lot."

"I'm sure you do."

Ben feels the muscles of his eye twitch. 

"So either you killed her, you're keeping her, or she ran away. That's it, isn't it?" 

"I would never," Ben hisses, and he dearly hopes the man thinks that he's referring to murdering someone rather than what he truly means—that he could never hurt his Rey. His sweet little Rey, probably lonely and cold and waiting for him with soft, open arms. The sooner he gets rid of the filth trying to separate them, the better. 

"Ben?" He hears her call, voice thick with sleep, and the man and Ben share a look before he darts upstairs. Ben sees red and lunges for a knife in the kitchen, snarling as he hears his large, lumbering footsteps above his head. Right near their bedroom door. 

Ben growls and jogs up the staircase and manages to catch the man just in time. He's shoving the bedroom door open and Ben tackles him to the ground, where they both look up in time to see Rey holding the blankets up to her bare chest. God, she looks so cute with one side of her hair ruined from sleeping on it. 

"I knew it! You filthy little whore, playing this man like a fiddle—" And Ben's reverie is shattered as rage once again engulfs him. 

"Plutt?" Rey splutters and tries to jump up and away from him, but she's caught by the leash. "Ben, why is he here?"

"Why is my best scavenger chained up in your bedroom, you _freak?_ "

This is the man that Rey had nightmares about. The man that starved her for weeks as punishment for daring to ask for something more to eat as a growing child. The man that tried to touch what is _his._ And without a second thought, Ben shoves the blade of the knife through the man's neck. 

He can taste the man's fear. This rush is what he felt when he had battered his father. He's serving justice where it is due. Han Solo had hurt his mother, so he had deserved to die. And this man has hurt his little Rey, so he too must perish.

Rey doesn't scream. Her eyes are wide and unblinking as she covers her mouth with a tiny hand, shaking. Ben rises and kicks the worm's ribcage so that he rolls over. 

Blood pours through the wound in a thick crimson stream, and Plutt gargles on it as he tries to speak. Of course he hadn't cut any major artery out of sheer luck for the both of them, as Plutt does not deserve a death of mercy. Fear is apparent in his wide, glassy gaze and Ben grabs the blade of the knife, having sliced clean through his neck, and pulls it out as he stomps on his chest. He ignores the cuts on his hands and the blood, mucus, and muscle on the handle as he stands over him. 

"You're not going to take her from me.  _No one_ is going to take her from me." 

He ignores her small sob and imagines what torture he can inflict on this worm. 

It's all for her. He's keeping her safe. She'll understand.

"Ben, stop! You can't do this!"

"He hurt you," he says simply. And he leans down to talk to the mess on his floor. "You hurt her. And now I'm going to hurt you." Ben promises, almost giddy. 

"Stop it, this isn't like you—" Ben sighs and shoves the knife in Plutt's outstretched hand, pinning him to the floor. Ignoring his cry of pain, he approaches Rey who stares at him like he's a monster. 

"He starved you—"

"He had his reasons! No one deserves death," she whispers. "He has a family that will be waiting for him. You don't need to do this." 

For a second she looks almost hopeful that he might listen to her. Then he cuffs her to the side of the bed before gagging her. 

"Beautiful." He ignores her scream of rage, muffled by the strip of cloth he'd torn off of his own shirt before kissing her cheek. Then he turns back to Plutt. He's choking on his own blood, and Ben can almost taste the life leaving him. "Where were we?"

* * *

  ** _Rey_**

How could she have tricked herself into thinking she loved him? She looks on in horror as Ben taunts Unkar, carving him like a feast as he looks up every so often to smile at her adoringly. She can't allow him to cosset her anymore. 

She's going to run away as soon as she can. 

Rey tries to wipe away her horrified tears but continues to get caught on the leash. Between the cuffs and the collar, Rey can't lean down enough or bring her hands high enough to dry her eyes. She's never felt so goddamn helpless and, unlike the other times when she had felt good about it, this terrifies her. 

At least he won't hurt her. 

The time seems to go by faster if she looks away. Plutt's screams and pleas grow more choked and less intelligible and eventually they stop, and that's even worse than his shrieks of pain before. She feels Ben's hands, sticky with blood, palm through her hair and his lips against her neck before he departs, probably to shower. 

When he's gone, Rey looks over at the body and were she not gagged, she would have retched right then and there. 

Simply put, it no longer resembles Plutt. His hands look like they've been removed and his throat is destroyed. Parts of his face are gone as well, and his tongue lies cut out beside a pile of his teeth. Ben is getting rid of any identifying factors. 

She looks away when Ben exits the shower. God, if he isn't attractive when he's wet but Rey would rather be in Plutt's place than put out for Ben anytime soon. He whistles as he works, and Rey finds herself unable to look away as he removes his limbs. Probably for easier transport. 

He leaves the room with one extremity at a time. She doesn't even want to know where he's taking them but when he comes back up, rinses his hands off, and removes all of her bindings save the collar and leash and pulls her into his arms as though he hadn't just murdered someone for the crime of  ~~~~ _being curious as to her whereabouts,_ he speaks. 

"I love you, pet." 

"I know," she replies, but her voice is shaking. Cold fear grips her as strongly as the man holding her against his chest. But if she can make it through the streets, she can make it through this, no matter how long it lasts.

Right? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry rey your boyfriend is a goddamn psychopath
> 
> plutts corpse inspired by the funkytown cartel video. dont google it


	10. Confiance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asphyxiation, arguments, and acceptance, oh my! Rey makes leaps and bounds and asserts herself while coming to terms with her situation in ways she hadn't even considered before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> long chapter but extremely important. from here on out rey is no longer quote unquote weak, but the direction this fic is taking might not be to everyone's liking. i tried to express as much as possible how rey knows kylo is fucked up and how she knows what he did was fucked up, and i tried to illustrate what triggers her change of heart, but writing it in a way that doesn't negate her character development in this fic or make her seem ooc as a whole was rather challenging. i also tried to make it seem like she wasn't forgiving him for murder so much as coming to terms with the fact that this is who she loves. i hope i did a decent job and that how she acts in this chapter isn't completely out of the blue, especially with how she acted in previous chapters, but hints of her coming to terms in this way are scattered throughout the fic. as always please enjoy!

_**Rey** _

"Wake up, love." Soft lips are pressed against her neck, strong arms wrapped around her waist and hugging her close.

She's never felt more disgusted. 

She can't really fight back though. She can't even move away from him. And while she had enjoyed the feelings of helplessness earlier and felt cared for and adored, all Rey can feel right now is despair. Deep and crushing. She feels Ben's finger swipe beneath her eye and she flinches before she notices he's wiping away tears she hadn't even realized she was shedding. 

"Hush. Don't cry. No one is going to tear us apart. I'll keep you safe. You don't have to worry." He kisses her temple and something in Rey breaks. 

She  _sobs,_ great ugly hiccups that has her entire body shaking with the force of her sorrow. Ben hums soothingly, pulling her closer, and she cries harder. She feels disgusting. 

"Don't cry. I'm here."

"That's exactly it, you great big  _psychopath,_ " Rey snaps. "You murdered him. You killed someone." His hands dance across her abdomen and Rey  _shrieks._ "No! You don't get to touch me anymore and I mean it! You have to let me go."

"No," Ben says simply and buries his face in the crook of her neck. Rey screams with frustration. 

"Then I'm never going to stop trying to get away from you. I'll tell Hux and Phasma that you killed Plutt. I'll hurt you if you touch me—"

"Don't be foolish, love. I'll stop you if you ever try to escape—and besides, that's if I ever stop keeping you tied up like this. I can just lock you away until Gwen and Armitage leave. And as for hurting me... You're tiny. So little. You couldn't do anything to hurt me." He tries to kiss her. 

Rey punches him square in the jaw. 

Ben howls in pain. "I will hurt you," Rey promises. "Let me go."

"No." He readjusts his grip and hugs her against his chest, pinning her arms down at her sides. Rey squirms and fights against him as he kisses her neck. 

"Stop it!" Rey commands. "I thought that _maybe_  I could love you— was even starting to, I think— and you ruined it," she hisses. "You're fucking insane. You murdered someone because they were worried about me. What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"You loved me?" 

God, how fucking typical. Rey begins to laugh at the complete absurdity of the situation. She will not resign herself to being his pet, his toy. Rey used to sleep with a doll she had made for herself when she was younger. That's all she is to him—a little  _doll_. And Rey is not going to take it anymore.

"You can love me all you want—can justify your sick actions as coming from a place of affection—but I will never love you." His grip slackens and she frees herself from his grasp, turning to stare at him. He looks as though he's been slapped, and Rey is flooded with power. "You could have done this normally. You could have let me go that first night. And I would have come back because I thought you were handsome. But you  _kidnapped_ me, Ben. You can't lock me away! I'm not a fucking plaything," she finishes, and Ben looks thunderstruck. 

His eyes well with tears. 

"You're right," he whispers. "God, Rey. I'm sorry." 

Oh no. No. He looks like a lost little boy now, fingers grasping for her warmth. Rey will not give in. She will not. He murdered someone right in front of her. 

For her. 

 "I'm sorry, Rey. I— I was so worried that he would take you away. I don't know what happened."

"That doesn't matter. You killed someone. You can't take it back. And I tried to stop you but you wouldn't listen. You never  _listen!_ You never think, you just... You just act. You didn't think twice about raping me—"

"But you liked it—"

"I still said no! I said no, and no matter how much I enjoyed it you still didn't care that I didn't want to have sex with you! You just took what you thought was yours," Rey seethes. 

"What can I do to fix this, Rey?" Ben asks, his expression earnest and open. Rey is about to reply with another snide remark when a plan forms in her head.

"You can take off the leash. I don't want to be tied down like this. I don't want to feel like a bedwarmer or a spoiled pet for you to cosset."  _Please, please bite._

Ben looks thoughtful and Rey presses her lips to his jawline, holding in the bile that rises in her throat. He hums approvingly and nods, moving to unlatch the collar from the bedpost. As soon as it's released, Rey grabs the end of it, loops it around his neck, and  _pulls._

"Fuck you!" Rey spits as his hands scrabble at his throat, but instead of rage all Rey can see in his eyes is a kind of resigned sadness. She almost falters but his eyes flutter closed and he falls limp. Too late to turn back now. 

She's free! Rey pushes his tremendous body away and leaps off of the bed, avoiding the bloodstains on the hardwood where Ben had killed Plutt and shoving open the door. Mentally Rey prepares an escape checklist. She needs clothes and— and a shower— and she really needs to get this collar off. 

There's another bedroom that she ducks into. Throwing open the closet reveals dresses, a bit old-fashioned but somehow timeless. Then she finds pants. They're too short.  _Dress it is, then._

Rey then runs down the staircase and moves to collect food. The pantry is filled with sweets— she'd never pegged him as having a sweet tooth—

They must have been for her. The silly little errand-runner must have picked the candy and confections up, the same boy that Ben had taken her in front of. Rey's heart aches but she remembers Plutt's mangled body and gargling screams and forgets all about Ben.  

_Ben._

Wide, strong arms seize her suddenly and pull her up off of the ground. "Bad, bad Rey."

* * *

  _ **Ben**_

He had been expecting her betrayal, but it hurts nonetheless. Her squirming and struggling has him surprisingly aroused, as did her nearly choking the life out of him, and her curses only serve to turn him on further. She kicks at him and he dumps her on the floor of the library, sitting crosslegged and yanking her sideways across his lap. As much as he loves her, she has tried his patience. It's time to show her that her insubordination has hefty consequences. 

"Did you think," he snarls, wrenching the skirt of her dress—his mother's dress—up violently, enough to tear the fabric in places, "that you could kill me and be done with it? That you could escape just like  _that?_ " He brings his hand down upon her bare bottom hard. Her legs spasm and a soft cry is wrenched from her throat. He grins savagely as her sweet, soft ass ripples with the force of his blow, red blooming upon the pale surface. He brings his palm down upon the other cheek just as swiftly and she whimpers. 

"Stop playing the victim here, Rey. You're just as bad as I am. You tried to kill me." Three slaps. 

Four. 

Five. 

Six.

She's sobbing now. "You can't get away, Rey.  _Submit._ "

"No!" She shrieks, twisting away from him and glaring up at him, the shimmer of tear tracks upon her cheeks. "You're a monster!"

"I know what I am, Rey," he growls. "I did it for you. For us. You think you're better than I am but you  _stole_ from people, pilfered their belongings and sold them. You justified it with a rogue's mentality, like you were some Robin Hood distributing wealth amongst the poor. You stole things from people."

He shoves her away and backs her up into a corner, lowering himself onto his haunches to better converse with her. He holds her chin into place and forces her to look up at him as he continues. 

"And you tried to kill me. Do you know what would have happened to you, had you gotten out? You would've been the first suspect in Plutt's death. Girl in the employ of one Unkar Plutt goes missing for days and returns, babbling about being kidnapped by a man who wouldn't have been able to because  _he can't leave his house_ unless it's to visit his legal team—and why the fuck would he snatch someone up while doing that?

"So you see, Rey,  _you're no better than I am._ I tried to kill my father because he had the gall to show up to the funeral of a woman he treated like shit. You robbed people in order to get food. I killed Plutt because he would have ripped us apart and would have _definitely_ harmed you. And you tried to kill me because—"

"Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me," Rey snaps, and Ben follows her gaze to the tent in his pants. Her little hands come up to wrap around the wrist near her face, trying to extricate herself from his grip. He squeezes her chin and her jaw falls open due to the pressure. Ben lowers his free hand to her bare pussy and finds her to be, surprisingly, wet. 

"You didn't care about Plutt," Ben realizes. "You were just scared of me. Scared of what I was doing and how I was acting. But it  _turns you on_ , my filthy, naughty little thief. You  _like_ this game of tug-of-war."

"You're disgusting," Rey snarls. 

"And you're wet. So how are we going to play this game, Rey?"

* * *

_**Rey** _

Rey is fucking  _livid_ because he's right about all of it. And what does that say about her? 

"Like this," she hisses, and pulls him down for an angry, impassioned kiss. 

She doesn't  _care_ anymore. No one is going to miss her. Plutt was going to beat her. Her code of ethics is just as fucked as Ben's at this point and it's time that she stopped giving a damn. 

So what if he ties her up? She can lie to herself all she wants but she  _likes_ it. She  _likes_ being taken care of, regardless of how fucked up his manner of going about tending to her is. The key to regaining her power isn't to escape or struggle or go along with his creepy whims, but to be honest with herself. 

"Do you want me to love you?" When she pulls away, he looks positively feral, but nods. He does love her. In an incredibly strange and downright unhealthy way, but he's not going to change and she can't manipulate his feelings for her into getting what she wants. She can't force him to let her go because he loves her. She can't tell him to stop something and expect it to happen because he loves her. He adores her, but it's a deep obsession and he will only go so far because he always thinks he's doing what's best for her. 

And maybe he is. 

"Then you have to trust me. You have to listen to me. I'll let you do whatever you want to me, let you kiss and coddle and look after me, as long as you trust that I'll stay here."

"Why should I? Why should I believe that you won't try to escape again? Why should I believe that you won't try to kill me again?"

"You shouldn't. But where else will I go? What else do I have to go to? This is life for me now." And she's not resigned; she's not upset about her fate. She doesn't need to leave to regain her power. She doesn't have to escape. Because as long as he trusts that she won't leave him (she  _knows_ his possessiveness stems from his long-standing fear of abandonment), she'll be able to feel like she has power again. 

"I won't leave you," she says softly. The way the day has unfolded has her head spinning, and how quickly this confrontation has evolved doesn't help, either. She's still half naked and he's still looming over her like she's dinner, but the lust has given way to a different sort of desire. 

A desire to be heard. To belong. 

"You don't have to kill people to protect me, Ben. I would never have gone back to him, would never have left you. You have to trust me." 

"Really?" Ben's voice cracks and Rey is struck with how young he appears in this moment while still being somehow sensual, trapping her as he leans down to nip at her neck. At the space just above the collar. And Rey likes the cold metal around her throat for some reason. 

"Yes. I would never have gone back to him. You just need to trust me." He looks thoughtful for a moment and then nods. 

"I'm sorry. It'll be... Rey, it will be difficult for me to trust you, but I will." He looks so earnest and willing that she can't help but to believe him. "I'll try. God, I love you." 

Rey climbs into his lap. This is so fucking  _surreal._ She laughs at how angry and scared she'd been earlier and compares it to now, where she's giving in and accepting all of his good and bad, all of his love and murderous tendencies in tandem. It's so goddamn fucked up and Rey is done caring. But she has his trust now, and that's all that matters. 

She's reminded of arguments that she would see on television between couples, and they would make up at the end and everything would be alright. This is one of those, Rey thinks, just dialed up to eleven-and-a-half. 

She can feel his knuckles running up and down her spine, soothing her, and as she's about to drift off he hefts her up into his arms and carries her back, presumably, to the bedroom. The swaying motion and how warm and secure his arms feel allow her to fall under, and his lips pressing against her temple gently is the last thing she feels as she slips into unconsciousness. 

* * *

Just as she'd expected, she's back in the bedroom. She's naked and still wearing the collar, but the door is unlocked and at the foot of the bed is a pair of underwear and a clean dress for her to change into. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> she get clothe...... Big Deel 4 Reel


	11. Conflit Interne

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey's happy, and Ben is too, until he's not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry for the wait. this chapter is longer than usual to make up for it. life has been crazy, but i will try to update more. things are going to get pretty fluffy from here on out, but rest assured there will be plenty of smut to come in this filthy story 
> 
> thank you for reading and supporting this story thus far <3

_**Rey** _

All things considered, the dress fits surprisingly well. Rey is perhaps not the smallest of women but she is by no means the largest, and the former owner of the dress must have been slight in build as well. She can't remember if Ben has ever addressed who his mother was or not, but she seems to be of great importance to him. The relationship he shared with his father--or lack thereof, she thinks with no small amount of humor--speaks for itself, so his mother must have been the only nurturing presence in his life. She doesn't want to think about the implications of that just yet.

(Oh well. She knows what she's getting into now. And she knows, no matter how fucked up he is, that he treasures her above all else. That has to matter for something, doesn't it?)

It's another timeless number, a deep, subdued purple that has a low neckline and a tight skirt that flares at the very end. It's not particularly revealing and it's just modest enough that she feels comfortable. All Rey can think is that Ben's mother must have had superb taste as she traipses into the ensuite, which she finds herself getting ready in. She feels like a giddy little girl getting prepared to go on her first date. Which is odd, because she's not even sure what Ben is doing. He may just be doing...  _Ben_ things. Good lord, what even are his hobbies? Surely he has better to do than to dote upon her? With that thought in mind she tucks her hair up into a loose bun and examines her reflection for the first time in quite a while--even when he'd been bathing her he had been too busy toweling her off for her to get a glimpse of any more than wild brown hair in one of the tremendous mirrors of the washroom. 

Rey thinks she looks... Different. Older. And like she's the devil's plaything in a dress that suddenly feels far too slinky on her and with hair so haphazardly piled behind her head she might as well have just been the recipient of a particularly passionate kiss. Rey wishes she was naked again.

She rubs at her eyes and exits the ensuite, sitting on the edge of the bed. Ben is doing things to her body, to her mind. His offering of clothing is a show of his trust, of the leaps and bounds that they've made together, so why is she so uncomfortable dressed like this? Maybe if she shows him that she enjoys his gesture but would rather remain as she has been for the past few days-- Weeks? 

How long has it even been, anyway? It can't have been that long. Scavenger Rey had run on a weekly schedule and that was how she had gotten through. Scavenger Rey would stake out a house one Sunday, then strike the next Sunday. She's been here since whenever last Sunday was. 

Scavenger Rey wouldn't be sitting here feeling uncomfortable in clothing. Scavenger Rey would have fought tooth and nail to leave from the offset, but here she is, wishing she were naked again. She could slap herself. 

Then again, she's still the same old Rey, isn't she? She doesn't necessarily have to be  _free_ in the conventional sense if she can get what she wants here. Ben may be one of the most irrevocably twisted individuals she's ever met in her nineteen years, but he cares about her and he's trying so goddamn hard for her in his own way. 

In the end, so what if she's uncomfortable in clothing like this now? Ben trusts her, and the mere act of giving her clothing speaks volumes in and of itself. Scavenger Rey was still  _Rey_. She's not any less of a person now than she was before.

Before Rey can continue her internal debate on justifying her prospective continued nakedness, she hears heavy footsteps treading up the staircase and stopping by the open door. Rey turns and peers over at Ben, who's leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. His gaze is interested but restrained, heavy but subdued, as though he's holding himself back. But he shakes his head and the quiet heat in his eyes is gone, replaced with nothing but affection. 

"I want to show you something," he says gently. Almost tentatively. It's almost cute how worried he is about fucking up, and Rey beams at him reassuringly. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. I promise you there's no ropes or corpses involved."

"Your jokes aren't funny, Ben," but her smile doesn't falter as he offers her his hand from the doorway. She stands, making a show of brushing off the skirt of the dress, and traipses over to him. It's almost like a date, although the only things Rey knows about dates is that they usually don't occur between a nutjob and his kidnapped sort-of-girlfriend. Nor would said kidnapped sort-of-girlfriend be accepting of her circumstances, but every relationship has its quirks. 

She slips her hand into his and he squeezes it, pulling her close as his other arm wraps around her waist. They're close, and Rey sinks into his embrace, their hands still clasped as he leans forward. "Can I kiss you?"

Rey flushes, her cheeks growing warm. She almost replies with a snarky  _you never asked before_ but she bites her tongue. He's trying per her request. He  _really_ wants her to love him. Well, she feels  _something_ right now, her heart squeezing painfully in her chest as she nods almost shyly. 

The touch of his lips against hers is soft and chaste, almost at odds with everything she's felt with him thus far. He's seen fit to task himself with the role of her teacher in the more depraved acts of the flesh, so for him to kiss her so sweetly is  _odd_ , to say the least. Even more strange is how when she tries to deepen the kiss,  _Ben_ is the one to break away. 

"I still have to show you the thing that  _isn't_ ropes or a corpse, remember? We can come back to this later." The  _if you want_ goes unsaid but it's the loudest thing in the room. 

Ben tugs on her hand then, leading her down the hallway. Rey stumbles over her feet as she struggles to keep up with him, but he seems to be genuinely excited so she's able to bear tripping a few times. When he glances back at her, the smile on his face is so  _pure_ and devoid of any lust or malice that her heart clenches. When they reach the bottom of the staircase he stops suddenly, but his good cheer is still plain to see on his handsome face. 

"Okay, so you obviously know the library," he begins, still holding her hand as he walks forward. "And I don't mean to presume, but I figured that you don't really know how to read very well. Enough to get by, but only just, right?" He turns his head to flash her a worried glance, concerned that he's being rude, but Rey merely nods. He's right. Encouraged, he continues. "So I thought that maybe I could teach you to read a little better. It's not much of a surprise, I know, but I thought you might like it. And we could spend more time with each other."

Before Rey knows it, tears are welling in her eyes. When she stops following him to wipe at her face with the sleeve of the dress, it only takes him a moment to begin panicking, but she gives him a watery smile and hugs him. "Thank you," she whispers. She'd still love Ben and every fucked part of his personality even if he weren't trying so hard, but just like the dress, the simple gesture speaks volumes. He's not trying to be someone he's not just for her sake. This is  _Ben._ Absolutely insane but romantic and oddly gentle at times. Ben ties her up and fucks her senseless, sure, and can be very violent, but he also worships her every movement, kisses her sweetly, and, for all intents and purposes, has just given her a fucking _library_. He's a fucking headcase but he's  _her_ headcase. 

"I'm sorry if I upset you," he murmurs, arms wrapped around her waist as he rubs his cheek on the top of her head. "I'm trying, I promise, but—"

"You didn't upset me." Rey isn't sure what triggered her crying fit, but it's certainly not sadness or fear. For the first time in a while she's  _happy._ "Can we eat? I'm hungry."

* * *

Ben made her fucking Spaghetti-O's.

_Spaghetti-O's._

Rey could almost cry again. She's never had them before but she has _always_ wanted some; it's comedic that it's being served on such ornate dishes, however. When he dragged her to the dining room, he'd pulled out the chair to the left of the one at the head of the table, taken a napkin, tucked it in her shirt and pushed her in. She's not even embarrassed by his doting upon her anymore, much less angry. But she  _was_ a bit surprised when he came out with a plate full of  _goddamn motherfucking Spaghetti-O's_.

He sits the plate in front of  _him_ when he takes the seat at the front of the table, and Rey is confused until he picks up a spoonful, blows on it, and brings it to her lips. 

Ben is trying to feed her. 

"What, no airplane noises?" But she doesn't fight it any further, leaning forward and eating the deliciousness he's brandishing before her to eat. 

"I can make airplane noises but something tells me that you wouldn't like that." There's a huge, satisfied smile on his face as he continues to feed her spoonful by spoonful, and Rey  _knows_ by now that his biggest joy is taking care of her like she's a child, but  _fuck_ is it still strange. 

Well, Ben is still Ben. 

"One last bite and you're all done, love." Rey leans forward to eat the last of the Spaghetti-O's and flops back in her chair, completely satisfied. He pulls the napkin out of her shirt and cradles the back of her head as he wipes her mouth off, smiling affectionately as she's cleaned up. Then he pushes his chair out, gathers the dish, and disappears to presumably rinse it off. 

Rey leans her elbows on the table and tucks her chin into her palm, waiting for Ben to come back. After a few minutes pass, much longer than it should take for anyone to wash a dish, she rises and makes her way over to the entrance to the kitchen. Ben is sitting on the floor, face buried in his hands, massive shoulders shaking as though he's crying. 

"Oh, Ben," Rey gasps, and he looks up at her, eyes rimmed with red. He reaches his arms out like a little boy and without another thought Rey rushes into his embrace. He crushes her against his body, sobbing into her shoulder as she tries to comfort him. Rey brushes hair away from his forehead and kisses his forehead in a mimicry of his own familiar gesture. 

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

He quiets down, then answers. 

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of my mother's death."

* * *

  _ **Ben**_

How could he have forgotten? It wasn't Rey's fault, not really, although in his desire to please her it had completely slipped his mind. Rey's bright eyes are  _huge_ as she looks up at him. She's so little, so gentle, so understanding even after everything he's done that he almost can't believe she's real. But he can't imagine the warmth that lay nestled in his arms, can he? 

"Why does your mother matter so much to you?"

If anyone else had asked him, he would have lashed out. Ben would have  _hurt_ them. But this is  _Rey_ and it's just an innocent question from his little princess. 

So he gulps and brushes his thumbs over her cheekbones, cradling her face in his hands, and nods, resolving to tell her. 

"When I was born, it was with a silver spoon in my mouth. This house was always bustling with people but no one had any time for me but Leia Organa. She was a rising star in the political field when I was just a boy, so she wasn't home much. But when she was she devoted her time to me. 

"Han Solo was rarely present as I was growing up. It tore my mother to pieces. She was incredibly strong but she loved my father, and for him to only visit her in spurts while still  _married_ hurt her deeply. She threw herself into her work but still made time for me. 

"She taught me how to read, how to do basic math and then hired a tutor for the more advanced stuff. I was homeschooled, basically, but in a very nontraditional fashion. Trust me when I say that I grew up isolated in the extreme, except for my mother. 

"She said that she raised me like this because people would try to use me for our money, and she was right. I left the house to make appearances with her and the older I got, the more attention I got. Women and men alike pretended to care about me, but it was all about the money. The second they got what they wanted, I was trash. I learned not to trust anyone but dear old mama.

"She was my role model. When I was around nineteen I got a scholarship to attend university, but my mother fell sick after the end of the first semester and I had to drop out to take care of her. She was the House Speaker, then. She kept that position for another six years, because the people loved her, until she received a call from my father. I still don't know what he said but I suppose that was the final straw, because she completely threw herself into her work. She was like a machine. And then when she was campaigning for re-election, someone pulled a gun on her and shot her. She died on the way to the hospital. 

"Then the rest is history. My father showed up to her funeral, I beat him to a pulp, got arrested, and through bribery and a good lawyer got sentenced to house arrest for fifteen years. I can only leave to visit Hux and Phasma for a maximum of two hours, but I usually stay much longer. They're so image-based and obsessed with upholding their perfect records that they fudge the reports of my time outside the house more often than not. If they didn't, I would get a bracelet if I'm lucky."

His throat itches and his eyes burn. Reliving the memories are painful. Rey attracted him because she was resourceful and pretty and had no idea who he was. She wasn't after his wealth, she just wanted to survive. And he couldn't give up the opportunity to keep someone like her, could he? Ben feels a peace he hasn't felt in  _years_ when he takes care of her, when he holds her close, when he fucks her senseless. Rey is the only person he  _truly_ has. 

"Ben," she murmurs, tucking her head beneath his chin. "You're not the only one who had nothing." 

 _I know_ , he thinks.  _But now I have everything._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im doing alright getting good grades futures so bright i gotta wear shades *harmonica solo*
> 
> my rey and kylo ren sims have 173 kids

**Author's Note:**

> im awed by the response that this fic has gotten! thank you all so much for your continued support, it means the world to me!
> 
> (ps any questions, comments, concerns, threats against my life, etc. can be sent to my tumblr at jigglypuffnipples.tumblr.com)
> 
> edit: 300 kudos! thank you so much!


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